Tag Archives: a song of ice and fire

The Musings of a Fan Girl: Five Fictional Places I’d Never Want to Live.

29 Apr

Man, I love me some fictional realms. If I had the option of spending the rest of my days kicking it in the Shire, visiting Diagon Alley, traveling to new places in the TARDIS, I’d be one happy duck.

However, as much as I love all my fandoms, I am sane enough to recognize that some of them aren’t exactly ideal locations to ever relocate to (though I am insane enough to say that I would totally live on the Island). So, having put some thought into it, here are five fictional places I would never want to live in/visit/even exist.

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5. Sunnydale. This one almost didn’t make the list, because I am so in love with all the characters on this show and the wonderful storyline Joss Whedon came up with… but here’s my beef: I hate vampires. No, not because of Twilight (though that didn’t help). Vampires have always creeped me out. Something about the idea of someone puncturing me with their teeth in order to suck out my blood… to be quite honest, I just got nauseous writing that sentence. It’s weird because I’m totally fine with all other sorts of violence you see on TV and in movies (wahoo desensitization!), but a person drinking another person’s blood? Ick. No thank you.

This has always been a thing for me, ever since I was a little kid, which is why I’ve always stayed far away from vampire related things. There have been exceptions, of course (ie. Buffy and the UK version of BeinHuman), but only because of the amazing characters and stories being told. Even so, as much as I may love the Buffy-verse and the cast of crazy characters who live there, man, I just would not be cut out to live on top of the Hell Mouth. There are scenes in Buffy where I literally have to look away because of how much all the blood drinking grossed me out. I almost threw up in a scene from Being Human. So no vampires for me, please. Stay out of my life.

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4. The Battlestar Galactica. I should probably amend this to say “any television show and/or movie that takes place on a space ship (except for Doctor Who).” The idea of being on a ship out in space has always freaked me. This probably has something to do with that fact that one of the adults in charge of my elementary school’s After School program, where kids could hang around waiting to get picked up by their parents, thought it was a good idea to show the film Apollo 13 to a group of kids when I was friggen eight years old. I was so deathly afraid of space for years, because I assumed everyone who went up there came pretty damn close to dying.

However, with shows like Firely and films like Star Wars, I guess you could say I’d be a little less reluctant to journey into the final frontier and concur this lifelong fear of space. But not on the Battlestar Galactica. As some of you know, I’m currently going through BSG, and man, those people cannot catch a fucking break. Every episode they’re losing their water or cylons are chasing after them or the people on the ship are rebelling and killing each other, and as much as I’ve come to love this show, fuck, living on a Battlestar seems like the last thing that I would ever want to do.

And knowing my luck I’d probably turn out to be a cylon anyway. (I could’ve been Number Nine!)

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3. Panem. Yeah, this one should be self explanatory. If you have ever said to yourself “Man, I wish I could live in Panem” then go check yourself into an institution ASAP. Panem may be an entire country, but even so, goddamn, there is not a single region there that I’d want to live in. The lower districts are dingy and the higher districts are filled with self indulgent assholes.

Plus, y’know, the whole Hunger Games aspect is really a turn off as well. Yes, as much fun as I’m sure it would be to live in a dystopian future where we cheer on kids killing each other for fame, I think I’ll have to pass.

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2. Jurassic Park. So I love Jurassic Park. I’m pretty sure I’ve established this dozens of times by now, so I’ll just leave it at that. However, as much as I love the story behind this film/book, holy hell, this is something I never want to be a reality. Someone approached me in the last couple months and told me the news about how scientists have realized it’s impossible to clone dinosaur DNA, and my response was a loud: “GOOD.”

The whole purpose of Jurassic Park is that we, as humans, should not play god, because it is guaranteed that life will find a way (and that we’ll fuck everything up). I don’t mind obsessing over a story that presents the notion of how dangerous over idealism is with dinosaurs running around in the background, but the second someone actually goes and creates a dinosaur, goddammit, I guess it’s time to get over my fear of space because I’m gonna have to get off this fucking planet.

1. Westeros.

HAH.

HAHAHAHAH.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

HOW ABOUT NO.

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Contemplating Theon Greyjoy.

31 Mar

I’m so conflicted when it comes to a particular character in Game of Thrones and in the A Song of Ice and Fire series. A character who, the first time reading the books and watching the show, I loathed so very much. Who I still kind of can’t stand the majority of the time he appears on screen. However, upon my recent rewatch of the show, he became a character I had to call into question. One who I found my dislike for dwindling. Not all the way, of course, I still can’t stand the guy most of the time, but, I mean…

Theon Greyjoy is such a dick.

… but he’s obviously a character with a complex upbringing, and one who can’t be fully judged without taking his complete story into consideration. As a fan, it’s important to keep in mind that Theon was raised as a hostage; never truly part of a family. Oh sure, he was treated like a brother by Robb, but he was never fully accepted into the rest of the Stark household. Never truly welcome. He was treated kindly enough, but he was always reminded that he was there for a reason: as a hostage for the crimes of his father.

Even so, Winterfell became his home. It became what he knew and what he loved. Then, after all those years of waiting, when he finallys goes back home to the Iron Islands – bam – he’s a disgrace for embracing the Stark’s way of life despite the fact that he had no fucking choice in the matter when he was a child. Never mind that it was his father who decided to send him away. Never mind that it was his father’s doing by starting a useless rebellion. Never mind that Theon never did anything wrong, nor did anything to deserve being sent away in the first place. Never mind that he was punished for crimes he never committed. Never mind that he was never in the wrong. At least, not at that point.

So, when it comes down to it, who is he supposed to side with? His own flesh and blood, who sent him away as a child, only to then treat him like he had betrayed them all by developing a relationship with a different family? Or the family who raised him well, but always reminded him that he would never be one of them? What the fuck would you do in his shoes? So, yeah, he thinks he can show his father he’s still a Greyjoy by ransacking the place that cared for him all those years, thus proving that they never meant anything to him. He thinks that will help him make amends for all the years he’s been away; all those years where he did absolutely nothing wrong. The thing is, Winterfell did mean a lot to him, and we so clearly see that as he’s taking over the Stark’s home in both the show and the book. He puts on that front of not giving a flying fuck about Bran or Luwin, but there’s just so much guilt riddling him (Alfie’s done such a phenomenal job with his character, seriously, that boy deserves a ton of awards). Especially when he kills Rodrick. He does it, yes, but man, you can tell that it’s the last thing he wants to be doing.

The point is, I feel bad for Theon Greyjoy. These are not words I ever though I’d say. I came to loathe his character over the years, and even still I’m not really a fan of him. Even so, I like to think if he didn’t have such a shit-tastic father he would’ve turned out a whole lot better. While he should never have gone against the Starks in the second book, I understand his folly. I’ve come to see the path he went down and why he choose it, and where all his bad choices have stemmed from. So yes, I can’t help but feel bad for him…

… but, man, he’s such a dick.

The best part: I didn’t make this graphic.

lazy saturday morning.

9 Mar

As I’ve already made clear time and time again, this school term hasn’t been a great one. It’s been an example of why I shouldn’t put things off to the last minute, and how horribly I crumble when I bite off more than I can chew. Two and a half jobs, seven classes, light crew, and an art show… Phew. It was a heavy work load, to be sure, which should explain my lack of entries on here as of late.

The term’s not over yet. We’re entering dead week in two days, and then to swiftly follow will be finals week. I’ve still got two portfolios to put together, three short stories to wrap up, and two more papers to write – not to mention three final exams to start prepping for. I’ve got a ways to go before I can breathe easy, and even after this term is over I still have one more term to go where I’ll have to throw myself into both Capstones to ensure completion, while also juggling four classes, preparations for my New Zealand excursions, and starting to make the transition into leaving Ashland, my home, behind. I don’t think I’ll truly be able to rest until I’ve crossed that stage and been handed my faux diploma.

And yet, this morning, I allowed myself some breathing room. I slept in until 9:30am, loitered about watching The Colbert Report and dicking around on Tumblr, and then I did something I haven’t done in ages. I got back in bed and spent two and a half hours reading. Nothing else. Just me and the book. It was glorious and comforting. I mean, there’s not much comfort in reading the A Song of Ice and Fire series (though I’m glad to say, unlike Monday when the book made me weep, today I found myself fist pumping the air), but the act of shirking the work I should be doing in order to escape to GRRM’s fantasy world… it was just nice, y’know? It’s nice to give yourself a break, which I don’t think I’ve done a good job of this term. Compared to the last two months, my work load today isn’t quite as grievous, so I allowed myself the chance to indulge. Everyone should indulge now and again, if only for the sake of their sanity.

98 days until graduation.

39 days of attending classes.

12 days until spring break.

6 days until finals begin.

I can do this.